Monday, February 8, 2010

The New Ministries

Now that we hear they have expanded the cabinet to forty ministries, I suggest they merge some and we can have a leaner cabinet. Sample this....

We can merge the ministry of Agriculture and transport and have THE MINISTRY OF FAST FOOD!

Ministry of Energy and ministry of gender can be merged and we can get MINISTRY OF SEXUAL ENERGY!

Ministry of education and ministry of livestock can be merged and we will have MINISTRY OF EDUCATED LIVESTOCK! Calling a foolish person Ng'ombe will become an instant crime.

Ministry of roads can be merged with ministry for justice and constitutional affairs and have MINISTRY OF LEGAL POTHOLES.

Ministry of sports and ministry of defence can be combined and no one will ever score a goal against our embattled Harambee stars due to the defence they will put in place. This can be called MINISTRY OF SOLID GOALKEEPING AND DEFENSIVE FOOTBALL!

Ministry of health can be combined with ministry of home affairs and we will have MINISTRY OF HEALTHY CONVICTS!

Ministry of labour, Ministry of gender and Ministry of commerce & Industry can be combined and we can have MINISTRY OF INDUSTRIOUS COMMERCIAL SEX WORKERS.

Also Ministry of internal defence and ministry of wildlife (forget the tourism) can be combined and once lions join the police force, you can bet no one will try anything fishy. The MINISTRY OF DEFENSIVE WILDLIFE will make sure no one throws stones in Kibera!

Ministry of Finance and Ministry of fisheries and wetlands can be merged and we will OFFICIALLY have Ministry of DANGEROUSLY RICH SHARKS! (read politicians)

Ministry of Science and technology can be merged with ministry of public works to get MINISTRY OF PROF. SAITOTI IMITATING KIRINYAGA CONSTRUCTION!

Ministry of land and settlement and ministry of foreign affairs can merge and finally Osama, Mugabe and Koffi Annan can own a piece of land here under orders from MINISTRY OF SETTLING FOREIGNERS!

Ministry of immigration and Ministry of tourism can be combined and we can stop the wildebeest from going to Tanzania every now and then without a visa. The ministry will be MINISTRY OF IMMIGRATION IN CHARGE OF WILDEBEEST TOURISTS.

Ministry of state in the office of the president can be merged with Ministry of communication to form MINISTRY OF STATING LIES IN GOVERNMENT DIRECTLY FROM THE OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENT. Mutua Alfie can be the minister.

Ministry of Communication and Ministry of Home affairs can merge into MINISTRY OF EFFECTIVE MARITAL DIALOGUES after which a remarkable improvement will be noticed in homes.

Ministry of East African cooperation and ministry of local governement should be merged and we can finally rule the whole of East Africa. Why? It will be MINISTRY OF GOVERNING EAST AFRICA LOCALLY.

Alternatively Ministry of internal security can be combined with ministry of gender and we can all forget sex!

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